Is It Really Worth It?

I went through a spell
Where I was alone; no one
I thought it was the worst
Going through the day; missing someone
Not knowing if I would ever find them
Now, I have found a few
The feeling of love is new
Yet I'm also in torment; most days
Over the strength of friendship
Always wondering how much I'm valued
How much I'm trusted; where I stand
Not a best friend; nor a casual one
I'm somewhere in between; yet where?
Secrets are kept from me; rules are made
So I'm wondering; is it overrated?
For while others enjoy friendship without thought
I question the strength of it
Am I a best friend; am I just another "friend"
What am I to those I call my friends?
Trying to interpret actions and words for what they mean
You may say I'm valued and trusted
Yet you show me otherwise
So complicated my life has become
I sometimes miss the old days
When I was alone; yet wasn't tormented
Over the things kept from me
When I had no one to love; maybe it's better
Lately, I'm wondering if it is
To just go through life without companions
Sounds like a pain to be alone
Yet what I'm feeling now; how can it be any worse?

Tears In My Eye

I fear I'm losing you
For you can't love me
Like I do you
You tell me it will never be
I wish you'd love me!
That song came on today
The one from my loneliest days
Had to change the tune
For it brought tears to my eye
Instant and big; they threatened to fall
Had to stop thinking about you
Yet I can't; I love you so
Just want to share your life
Your refusal cuts my heart
Like a knife plunged deep; I weep
For all that could've been
For all my love for you therein
To many rules; to many laws
When love doesn't care
It doesn't follow logic; even though your laws aren't
Why can't you break them!
Just this once; for me
Losing you will hurt me bad
I don't know if I will ever let love in again
For it torments my heart; my emotions
I've never felt this bad; never been this mad
For I'm losing the one I love
All because of Him above

Moving On

To look at you're beautiful
Takes my breath every time
The first time I saw you I was stunned
That someone so amazing could exist
I never thought we'd cross paths
Yet we did; you became my friend
I couldn't be thankful enough
That I had a friend as great as you
We talked day after day
Yet we didn't meet, as much as I wanted
You were hesitant; reluctant
I couldn't understand why; as much as I tried
Then as we continued to share; my feelings changed
I started to love you, my best friend
Yet I still couldn't see you; it hurt me so
How could best friends not meet?
I longed to see you, week after week
Yet the days continued to go by
All I could do was try hard not to cry
I missed you so much!
I told you as much
As the days went by
My tears started to dry
The pain started to fade
I don't think of you much these days
Yet you'll stay in the past
Cause I had to let you go at last
I just couldn't deal with the pain
I wish you best luck in your life
Remember that I once loved you

A Lonely Time of Year

It's summer again
For most, adventure; freedom
For me, a dark time
A lonely time
For when everyone's with their friends
I'm alone; nobody to hang with
I love the beach, yet I wish I had another
Someone to share my time with
To be with for all these days
Yet that is not how it is
What went wrong, I think
For me to end up all alone
The question is one that's never answered
For I can't see myself in other's eyes
So although I may go out and look happy; normal
I am really crying rivers inside
Longing for someone to love me

A Lazy Summer

Hot; the sun shining down
Baking the earth; so warm
Down at the beach; in the sand
What else to do?
But lay here, when it's so hot
Pretend I'm a cat, and sleep all day
Feeling the warmth seeping in me
Spreading among my body
Nothing could be better
Have work that I should do
Yet I just can't get up
I'm rooted to this beach
If I try, I stumble in the sand
Fall back down; only to sleep some more
No work; my day off, no thinking today
My brain is shut down; sleep mode
I look up at the sun and smile
Bury deeper into the sand
Flows over me like a warm blanket
I could stay here all day
I go back to sleep

After The Day

Work work, all the time
Now it’s time to play
Go to the bar, with all my friends
Party all night; there’s no end
Drink drink drink
Here’s to the good times, the glasses clink
Out on the dance floor here we go
Just dance to the music, go with the flow
The floor is hopping,
My head is bopping
The liquor is flowing, rivers of it
Faces are glowing, drunk we get
Look at that guy! He’s so funny
Look at your nose; let me tweak it
Tweak tweak; I got your nose
I think I may be a little drunk
Hahaha, you so funny! Look, I’m a bunny!
Hop, hop, hop, I go, wiggle my bottom
Sniff your nose, I want a carrot
Bugs wants a carrot!
Why am I laughing?
Hahahaha, you laughing at me?
Serious dude, stop..hahahaha..stop laughing
Ok that’s it, youve done it
Outside, the cool night air
Fists flying, punching air
I’m too drunk, drunk as a skunk
Keep missing my guy, damn my eyes!
I’m on the ground; how did I get here
I can’t stop laughing, it fills my ear
Ok time to go home; fuck dude
Where did my keys go?
I start to roam; wonder about the street
Looking for food to eat
Thank God it’s Saturday tomorrow!
I’m going to be hung over; feeling sorrow

Show Me, My Love

Please, my love
Show me what I mean to you
I’m tired of guessing
So withdrawn are you unto yourself
All I want is to see your love
To know your mind; your secrets
For you are a very private person
Yet there shouldn’t be anything holding you back
There are others you love; you share with
Why not me? How I love you so!
My first thought; my last thought
The focus of my dreams
So please, my love, open yourself to me
Your heart, your mind, I want to explore
To be among those you trust; you confide in
So my lovely, know that I want to see the real you
You know how I feel; it’s up to you now

You are You

You are amazing
You are shy; very shy
You are compassionate
You are beautiful
You are stunning
You are hilarious
You are loving
You are dedicated
You are precious
You are you
You are my friend

A Distance Kept

I couldn’t believe it when I met you
That my luck was so good
As to find such a wonderful person
To be my friend; someone so caring
I gave my trust to you
Told you everything without fear
Now I’m beginning to wonder
Did I give to much?
For while I have made an effort to get closer
You have made an effort to stay at a distance
I wanted to know everything about you
Yet you kept me at bay
Saying you trusted me; I don’t think so
For to trust is to tell; without hesitation
You are full of hesitation; reluctant
I am beginning to wonder; how you view me
You know, without doubt, how I love you
Yet the feeling is not returned
I’m not sure what to think
When I ask you; your answers are vague
Never saying anything directly; I’m left to guess
Which is never good; imagination running wild
Full of possibilities; reasons why you can’t trust me
I just don’t know what to think
I just don’t know what to think

Questioning Love; Friendship

I used to think love was the best
To have friends enriches life
So many fun memories; people to laugh with
To share your feelings with; to have them shared with you
Yet I am now beginning to wonder; now that I’ve tasted it
Sweet on the outside; yet I fear the core is bitter
To have feelings for a friend that aren’t returned hurts
To want to just see them all the time; normally
Yet if they don’t want that; it hurts
For your mind to be in constant turmoil over how they love you
If they don’t want to hear you say it.....
There are so many rules; spoken or unspoken
When there shouldn’t be; you’re just friends
For them to have so many secrets; to keep things from you
When you tell them everything
There comes a point where you say
Is it worth it?
To go through the emotional stress of friendship
I am beginning to think not
That it’s better to only have casual relationships
The ones where love doesn’t play a part
That it’s better to keep your secrets to yourself
Your feelings
Because in the end, who else can you really trust?

It’s cccoldd!

The winter is in full force
As freezing wind whips my face
Aggressive; trying to cut through me
Hail blows into me; like a million tiny rocks
The ground below me is frozen
As are my feet; my toes I can’t move
The snow is deep; comes up to my knee
Jeez!  It’s cold!
As I wait for the light to change; shivering
My hands are icicles; I can’t move my fingers
Bloody winter!
It’s been like this for weeks; non stop
Just want to leave; go to Hawaii
As I finally get to the office
Can’t wait to have some coffee
For the next eight hours anyway
I will be comfortable

The Full Time Student

You are amazing; brilliant
Always working; hours and hours
You spend each day; on homework
Studying; non stop
No time for friends; they will wait
School comes first; grades are everything
Nothing less than perfect will do
Stay up all night; trying to finish
Friends keep texting; turn off the phone
You must finish; it’s due tomorrow
You strive to please your parents
To please yourself; you set the bar high
Some call you a bookworm
Yet you’re not; just dedicated
To your studies; your future
When you get the perfect grade; excitement
All your work is worth it; so happy
No time for celebration though
Class starts again soon
You must prepare
Thus is your life; for the next five years

Where Am I?

I often feel lost
Just floating in space
Nowhere to go; just live
For that’s all I can do
Waiting for the day
When I find my purpose
For the son to coach at the gym
The daughter to caution about boys
For the girl I choose
To spend the rest of my life with
Just waiting for all those things to come
Not sure how to get them; no plan
Yet I am living; moving forward
Cause that’s all I can do
Just enjoy each day; enjoy life
Otherwise you miss it
Always planning for the future
Yet not living in the present
So although I have no clue
Where am I?
I know that someday, I will get there

This Is I

Happily, I will talk to you
Lovingly, I will care for you
A friend, I will be there for you
I am stubborn, don’t like change
Yet eventually I do change
The sun makes my day
I could lay in it for hours
Speed is my friend, I have no time
Yet I like to chill, there’s no rush
Music is the essential in my day
The soundtrack to everything I do
I love meeting people, I see the good in them
I am shy, yet will talk for hours with those I trust
I am outgoing; only the public part of me though
I hide my true feelings, to share with those I love
Chatting, my favourite part of working
Pure bullshit most of the time, yet sincere
Good looking bodies draw my eyes
Men, women, doesn’t matter
Sex is sex, an orgasm an orgasm
Physically, the same; only the emotional side
That’s what I look for, someone I can talk to
I have yet to find that person, the one for me
I can’t live without a car; refuse to take the bus
Exercise is my liberation; always an enjoyment
I love pushing myself, physically
Mentally, I’d rather sleep
Full of laughter, I don’t shed tears
Yet I get depressed, only when I’m lonely
Writing fills me with contentment; with joy
Only what I want though; I won’t be told what to write
Routine rules my life; when it’s broken there’s hell to pay
Nature blows me away; a sunset is a miracle
I realize material possessions don’t matter
Love and friendship are one and the same
Yet I love nice things; couldn’t live without them
Communication is essential to a long lasting relationship
I’ve always known that, yet haven’t been a part of it
I will always be loyal to the ones I love
Unless the day comes, when I no longer love them
Yet I am most forgiving; most merciful
And that isn’t saying I am Allah
Forgive me for using the phrase; yet it describes me
I love with a passion; it fills my heart
This is me; this is my life
For better or worse, I will live it

No Explanation

Lately, you’ve been withdrawn
Used to hear from you all the time
Now, only once in a while
You act like everything’s all right
Like nothing has changed
Yet what am I to wonder
There must be a reason; I must know!
I would understand a explanation
Even if it hurts, I will accept it
For I love you my dear
So you have my ear
Please explain your actions
For I am one who notices minute changes
And it is undeniable; you’ve changed
Maybe it is I who have changed, in your eye
Yet whether it be me, or it be you
I must know the reason; truly I must
For sitting here wondering is the worst
My logic can’t find any in you
I need to be shown how you think
So, my dear, please satisfy my confusion
For better or for worse, know you have my love
Forever and always

A Pleasure Filled Night

Pleasure tingles through me
As she pours the wax on me
So hot! I wither under her
The clips are next; I suck in deeply
My nipples are searing; metal clips are cold
I am under her control; she’s my master
I’ve been very naughty; must be punished
She is relentless; the nine tails comes down
SMACK! SMACK! I cry out
You’ve been a bad boy; yes mistress!
Out come the chains; up I go
Chained to the wall; I’m a prisoner
They are cold on my skin; as she wraps them
All around me; between my legs
She pulls it tight; it squeezes
I am going crazy; her hands start to work
Their fingers working their way down my body
Skipping over where they’re needed
I cry out in frustration; in anticipation
The night’s just starting; she’s my master
I must obey her; she’s my god

Always and Forever

Love is blind, that much is true
I would do anything for you
I would die for you
I would lie for you
I would give my life
For you, my wife
You mean everything to me
Without you how can I be
My world isn’t complete without you
I live to see your lovely eyes of blue
You are my one and only
With you, I’m never lonely
You mean everything to me
I can’t wait to have kids with thee
When we grow old, I will be there
To nurture, to love and care
I will be there to the end
All your troubles I will mend
So please know my dear, today, our tenth year
I will always be there, always want you near

Love To Strong To Break

This friendship is getting hard
Not seeing you for this long
When you live so close
What am I to think
I've told you how I feel many times
Yet you keep putting me off
Saying you're to busy; yet you're not
You spend time with your other friends
I talk to you everyday; yet you're private
So hard for me to understand
I just want to know where I stand
You know I love you
But what am I to you
Your actions contradict your words
To say you love me; yet stay away
So I'm kneeling here before God to pray
Please let her have the strength to let me know
Either way, where I am in her heart
I am asking this as a last resort
Words of pray; I don't often declare
Please guide me through this my lord
I love her so very much, yet I am hurt
I can make a choice if only I know
In what role do I play in her life

Tired Of Love

This feeling is wearing me down
This love I feel for you; too much
I could never really describe it
Suffice to say it wears; rips and tears
Tears at my heart; longing to get out
Yet I can only tell you so many times
You have listened and told me the same
That you loved me; yet what am I to think
When you say one thing; your actions say another
Full of contradictions you are; which you won't explain
You will talk to me; yet not tell me everything
You will say you consider me a best friend
Yet will not see me when I ask
If I press you to explain; you recoil
Everything I know about you is bits and pieces
Told over a million conversations
Never explained fully; you leave me to wonder
When all I want to do is be in your heart
I wish you would trust me more; I love you so
My trust in you is deep; yet your heart isn't mine to keep
If I felt you didn't love me, I could understand
Yet your words speak otherwise; just look into my eyes
See the hurt and confusion in me; tell me how you think of thee
Because I need to know; your heart you need to show
I can't have a distant relationship with you; it kills me not to see you
To hear from you everyday; yet not be with you so I can say
I love you like I've never loved another; yet we need to be true to each other
That is the way friendship is supposed to be; let's talk about why you hold back from me
Just sit and talk for a day; about all your feelings about me, I want to hear your say
To know where I stand; this much I demand
For I'm feeling tired of this crazy feeling that is love
So please let me into your heart, my love

Love Has No Logic

Why must I love you so
When I know you’re just going to go
Leave me here all alone
Sitting in my empty home
I never thought I could feel this
Sometimes it’s torture, most it's bliss
Feelings I have for you are strong
I don’t know what went wrong
For I said to myself I wouldn’t fall
Yet I gave my heart to you, my all
To do with as you will
Knowing my love I cannot kill
Even if it hurts to not see thee
Love’s one thing I cannot change in me
You make me smile when I think of you
Cheer me up when I’m blue
You’re always there for me; my best friend
I will love you always to the end

The Happy Bee

Look at her in that dress
Clinging tightly to her chest
The dance she’s doing causes ripples
I am stunned by her amazing nipples
Moving her body to the beat
All shiny and wet from the heat
The music is pounding in my head
I can’t wait to get her into bed
For now she’s doing this tease
Then it’ll be my turn to please
Her waist is small
My favourite thing of all
She’s getting closer to me
I want her honey; I’m just a bee
Longing to buzz around her hive
I open my mouth and take a dive
Oh the juice is just so sweet
She moans when her lips and mine meet
Greedily I drink all I can
After all I am a man
Drinking is my greatest pleasure
Her juice a precious treasure
Above me she thrashes
When my tongue and her bud clashes
I love being the one to taste her flower
All through her I can feel my power
Soaring through her until it reaches new heights
I love giving her these delights
Finally she can take no more
We’ve both fallen to the floor
I look at her; she comes to me with a smile
The pleasure is now mine for awhile

The Last One Standing

Silence envelopes me
The air is still; cool
It’s dark; yet my senses tingle
Hyper-alert to everything
If a leaf dropped a mile away I would hear
Where are all the lives
It’s only myself, when life should be everywhere
How I survived; I do not know
Standing in a forest; yet no animal stirs
The skies are clear; devoid of birds
I am the only one left on this earth
Walk to streams; the water is still
Unmoving; its life vanished as well
I can’t be the only one left
I start walking; to find life
Somehow knowing it’s no more

The Hungry Cat, The Bird of Blue

Hey you!
The black cat
Where is my bird; you look extra fat
Let me check your mouth for signs of blue
Tweety wouldn’t disappear I knew
He isn’t where he last sat
What have you done, you blasted cat!
Now you have filled my heart with rue
You would be gone if I didn’t love you
So the next pet I get, will be a second cat
Let’s see how you like that!

You To Me

Like a star you shine
Like the sun you light my day
Like water you refresh me
Like a miracle you amaze me
Like a grand canyon you take my breath away
Like a puppy you make me smile
Like a diamond you make me feel valued
Like a rock you hold me steady
Like a foundation you support me
Like a mother you love me
Like a friend you’re there for me
Like a sister I love you

My Torment

This is torment
The feeling I have
The one you won’t help
I need to see you; such a simple thing
Yet you refuse; out of fear, anxiety
Not realizing how hard it is on me
Missing you so much everyday
The only thing on my mind
To see you; spend time together
I feel like crying; this is the worst than being alone
I don’t understand; I love you so much
Yet you’re holding me at a distance
You’ve said you loved me; yet you have not shown
To love is to want to be with, if only friends
Yet you refuse! Testing my love everyday
You tell me you’re shy; uncomfortable
I’m your friend; it shouldn’t be so
We are meant to spend time
To hang out, as friends do
Everyday I tell you I love you
Yet at a distance I still am kept
It’s tearing me apart; breaking my heart
What am I to think; I no longer know...

Sensuality In Dancing

In the club dancing
Hot, moving
The music pounding
His body is rock hard
Running my hands down his stomach
Feeling the ridges under my fingers
Makes me long, for his body
Grinding; working hard
I hand him another drink
He’s looking better by the minute
His hands slither down me
Below my waist they go
Hips are moving; wanting to get close
His lips look enticing; dangerous
I want them for myself
Lean in and they touch mine
I always get my way
Tongues are entwined; which one’s mine
Tasting; sensuality flowing between us
His muscles are strong; I can feel them
Tensing to my touch; responding
He leans and whispers so I might hear
Let’s get out of here

Hurting

It pulls at my heart
That almost physical pain I feel
When I’m really hurting
Needing to see you; you can’t
Yet you’re close; I can’t see
I asked, pleaded; you said no
That you’d rather be left alone
If only in reality
Yet we talk everyday; all night
A women of a beautiful mind; many pains
Those are what hold you back
Causes you to put distance between us
It’s better, you say; while I just sit here
Crying; tears of frustration rolling down
I wish you’d see how much I love you
That my love would be enough
Yet it’s not; I’m hurting badly
Like never before; love in the cause
To love a distant person; the worst pain
Like a dagger in my very being
Blood dripping; my heart is crying
For all that love I feel; unconditionally
With frustration; it’s never ending
You say friends have left
Because you couldn’t get past that emotion
You know that would never happen
Yet I’m in constant torment
Thinking how happy I am to see you
Thinking why can’t I have that everyday
Why must it be so long; such an ordeal
A test of my love for you; it feels
Yet  my love is strong; has deep roots
Holding steady through the storm
Even though sometimes I just want to let go
Let my heart be blown away; not to return
My roots are deep; even if I try
The love keeps me steady
As much as it hurts me; I’ll be here
Struggling to abide by your laws
Wishing and hoping for the day
When you are able to revoke them

Grateful for a Star

The sun shines down
Strong, fierce
Powerful enough to burn
Yet gentle enough to give life
A perfect balance; life requires both
Without the sun; everything dies
The earth would be lost; drifting
No longer a place for it in the universe
Cast into darkness; earth would die
Slowly wasting away; no new life
To look up in the sky; see the sun
Think; this is the reason for existence
And be grateful we have this beautiful star

Broken Promises

I said to myself I would never love again
It hurts to much i said
Like a thousand needles in my heart
So I made promise, I did
To keep at a distance, never to love
Never to show my heart
To keep it safely locked away
Guarded by a thousand walls
It was lonely, but not that bad
Some days I was happy, some I was sad
Then you came along, opened up your arms
Strong though I am, you tumbled those layers
To all come crashing down
I was vulnerable; my heart in my hand
Talking with you, I could be true
Tell you all the things on my mind
Yet some things just can’t come to life
Only emotionally, were you in my life
Everyday I longed to see you
Yet you couldn’t; oh how I missed you!
To be so close to someone; I love you so much
It was killing me never to see you
Yet that was such
I love you more than anything
I know that is such
To love and not see, is just to much
To much for my heart to bear
I still talk to you everyday;  I know you’re there
Sometimes I wonder why, why I did this much
To love you like I do, and not see you is such
Such a constant pain, deep in my heart
You live so near; yet I feel we are worlds apart
So please don’t be hurt; I love you with my soul
But I can’t break my promise again in my life
So I’m moving away; I just can’t stay
To live so close; and not see you everyday
I’m closing my heart, love I now fear
I can’t escape from broken promises,
As long as you’re near

Unconditional Love

My father wasn’t nice to me
Not just unfair like the rest can be
He didn’t like me from the start
I just couldn’t wait til we would part
He would push me away in a time of need
Couldn’t see my feelings through his greed
My mom tried to help me a bit
Yet every time she tried, he would hit
Withdrawn I became, hid my heart
All the while inside, I was falling apart
Loyal to him is how I would be
Not knowing how much it was hurting me
Ten years later, I still can’t forgive
Yet through it all I have love to give
His actions have still an impact in my life
My heart is still damaged, cut like a knife
I hope someday I will see
He was my father, but he didn’t deserve me

Betraying a Delicate Heart

My poor delicate heart
Breaking everyday
Falling apart
Why did you have to say
Those words which broke my heart
I still don’t understand to this day

I gave you my all
Only to be pushed; to fall
You took my heart; made it bleed
Even when I showed you my need
The happiest man you made me
My love for you was all I could see

Now, I sit here, I’ve moved on
I still don’t know why you are gone
You were my first true love
I would’ve given you the skies above
However, you betrayed me, you did
So I went inside myself; I hid

Love 'Til It Hurts

I never thought it would be like this
To love someone so much I'm in bliss
The thought of losing you makes me cry
All the teardrops that would fall from my eye
I don't want to leave
My life I was just starting to weave
Only to have it all fall apart at the seams
Now every night I cry in my dreams
I love you to death
I would literally give up my breath
My life didn't start til the day we met
I would see you everyday, if only you let
You are always there for me in a time of need
Was patient with me through all my greed
For before we met I was a different guy
You changed me little by little as the days went by
Made me want to be the best I could be
You were there everyday, you believed in me
I now see life in a completely new light
You have also kept me up late at night
For there's nothing I'd rather do
I live my life to talk with you
Just the thought of you puts a smile on my face
The sight of you, I could light up the place
You have trusted me with your heart
I couldn't bear the thought of us apart
From the day I first met thee
I knew there was finally a friend for me

The Receding of My Heart

You are the loveliest person I've ever met
Everything to me; caring, kind
Your soul is good, honest
It hurts me so much not to see you
To know you’re minutes away
Yet you could be thousands of miles
The love I feel for you is unrivalled
My heart feels like it will explode
I know you love me; as I love you
Yet circumstances beyond my control
Keep us apart; forbid us to meet
Like a knife in my heart; it hurts me so
So I’ve made a resolve; to recede to before
Before we met; my heart was locked then
In a safe box; untouched by love
I know it will be hard; painful
Yet nothing could hurt more
Then the pain I feel now; missing you
It will fade over time; the love I feel for you
Lessening the pain everyday; until I return
Return to the lonely state of yesterday
Being alone is hard; missing you is impossible

Gathering my Inner Strength

What’s wrong with me I say
Having so many feelings everyday
I should be stronger than this
When I’m with you, it’s bliss
I promised myself never to care
Cause hurt pulls the heart; it tears
After I met you I knew I was done
Having you for a friend was too much fun
Thinking of you made me lazy
The love I felt for you was crazy
Just the thought of you put a smile on my face
Then I found out you were leaving this place
Into despair I was hurled
The thought of losing you; my stomach curled
All the time we have yet to share
Why are you leaving; it isn’t fair
You are the most amazing person I could meet
Without you in my life; the world will be bleak
You showed me the meaning of true love
Introduced me to God in the skies above
I will miss you like nothing else when your gone
It will take all my inner strength just to move on

Lost

I was so happy, so content
Knew my place in life
It wasn’t perfect
Although it was close
Everyday I lived; merrily
Busy a lot; safe above all
Everything was there; essentials to happiness
Love, friends, play

It was in the back of my mind
Lurking there like a disease
Growing a tiny amount everyday
After a year, it was bigger
Every year therefore; it grew
Until the day came; you left
It exploded; took over my whole body
Invaded my heart; tearing it to shreds
I was lost; no longer had a place in life
Into the darkness, I was thrown
After all the years of light; none
The black drove me crazy; insane
Couldn’t stop crying your name
That you could come back and pull me out
The agony was unbearable; surely this was hell
I didn’t think I could get out; as much I tried
Every time I would get close; almost
Only to have one thought of you throw me back
Like it was happening all over again
Nothing left of my heart anymore
It’s gone; a black, cold, empty space all that’s left
I want so badly to get out of this place
Can’t do anything; so so cold
The pain brought me to the floor
Couldn’t get up for my life
Everyday I just lay here now
Thinking of you; how you left

The Empty Boat

Sitting in this row boat
Knowing I have no hope
No hope for a happy life
None for having a wife
Don’t have a single friend
My life is awful; must end
So here I sit in my boat
A rock tied to me so I don’t float
The lake is quiet, it is deep
It won’t take to long for me to sleep
Into that eternal sleep I will slide
I throw the rock over the side